The murmur of voices were all around him but he didn’t take part. He could hear his voice speaking in his head but he tried not to listen. Instead he focused on keeping his clean suit clean. He would have to return it tomorrow if he didn’t get buried in it tonight. He bit down on his cheek. James, his therapist urged him to stay away from negative thoughts. So he scanned the area around him, forcing himself to say happy thoughts about the things he saw. The white table cloths were still white. The small boys clad in miniature suites seemed happy chasing the little girls in fluffy dresses. The servers had smiles on their faces. They were probably false smiles. He bit his cheek.
“Mr. Redrick, it was very nice of you to join us for this special occasion.” The deep scratchy voice came from behind him causing Redrick to turn and stand. He shook the mans meaty outstretched hand.
“Thank you sir. I appreciate the invite to your daughters wedding. You must be very happy for her.”
“Would you join me for a cigar?” It was phrased in a question but Redrick knew it was nothing less than a command. The father of the bride placed his meaty hand on Redricks shoulder and guided him away from the semi-circle of white tables. They walked away from the large patio which housed most of the festivities and took a small pathway leading through the gardens. When they were out of earshot the man stopped and pulled two cigars from his pocket. Redrick took the one-handed to him. The bride’s father began to lite the cigar, twisting it in his mouth as the flame slowly crept up the match. Just before the flames licked his fingers he flicked the match out and puffed heavily on the cigar, the red embers burning brightly.
“Redrick.” Charles. He finally remembered the man’s name. It was Charles. Redrick looked over his shoulder at the mass of people enjoying the happy occasion. “Redrick I know I am supposed to be happy today and I am. My daughter is beginning a life with a man she cares a great deal about, but I can’t help but to think she is making a mistake.”
Redrick turned his gaze from the wedding back at Charles. He was staring off into the expansive gardens where dozens of varieties of flowers bloomed beautiful colors and where the water fountains relaxed the mind. He didn’t know what to say.
“When Victoria was young all I had to do was take her out for ice cream and a walk in the park and she would be happy. I remember one winter night about six years ago she came to me crying and collapsed in my arms. I hadn’t seen her like that since.” Charles paused and took a long drag of the cigar like it was a cigarette. “I hadn’t seen her like that since her brother died. I brushed the tears from her face even though she kept crying and saw a lost girl. I never thought I would see her so lost and sad. I asked her what was wrong and she was crying so much, she couldn’t respond. I did the only thing I could think of. Even though it was the middle of the night during winter after a snowstorm. I took her to get ice cream and walk in the park.” He stopped again. His eyes glistened in the fading rays of sunlight.
Charles continued, “The ice cream worked, thank the heavens. If it didn’t I don’t know what I would have done.” He chuckled and took another drag on the cigar. “It took an hour before she could begin to tell me what happened. When she did though, it came out distorted and in an order which made no sense but I did manage to retain one key piece of information, a name. I repeated that name to myself every time I heard her crying over the next few weeks. Then time passed and her wounds began to heal.”
Charles glanced over his shoulder and found his daughter in the crowd of people. She looked beautiful in her white dress and a smile, but her eyes didn’t have that sparkle in them. He turned back and watched the sun begin to set over the tree’s on the horizon. Charles took a drag on the cigar.
“I never thought I would hear that name again. Surely not on her wedding day.” Charles paused and took one last long drag of the cigar before he turned and began to walk away. He had taken two steps when he stopped and looked back at Redrick.
“Never did I think I would be sharing a cigar with him, while she danced with her husband. For what it is worth, I have never seen her half as happy, as when she was with you Reddrick. Life is cruel. You should have been the one I walked my daughter down the aisle to.”
Mile 29 